The Wicked Witches:
These are the people that cannot, under any circumstances, let the rain touch them! You see, much like the wicked witch of the east (Wizard of Oz reference for those just landing from Mars) if these people get wet they will proceed to melt until they turn into a puddle of clothes and weird orange smoke.
How to spot a Wicked Witch:
Wicked witches are easy to spot because they are standing in one place. Usually seen crowding together in a shop doorway or under a particularly fetching awning, these people will block your entrance to said store, and stay in position until the rain stops.
N.b. Many wicked witches have simply given up in the city of Aberdeen and have decided never to leave the house.
The Mary Poppins':
The Mary Poppins' aren't as cheery as they sound. They are quite like the Wicked Witches in the respect that the really don't want to get wet so they came prepared. By prepared I mean these clever cookies brought a brolly...but then the wind hits!
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Photo Credit: https://moesgrandtour.wordpress.com |
The Mary Poppins' aren't as cheery as they sound. They are quite like the Wicked Witches in the respect that the really don't want to get wet so they came prepared. By prepared I mean these clever cookies brought a brolly...but then the wind hits!
How to spot a Mary Poppins:
Mary Poppins' can be seen desperately trying to stay dry whilst fighting with an umbrella which is actively trying to hit people or take off into the world of lost umbrellas. Most of the time these people will lose their fight and become one of two other stereotypes- Wicked Witches Or The Flash.
The Flash:
These people are fast! One minute they are there and the next *poof* gone!
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Photo credit: screenrant.com |
How to spot a Flash:
If you do it will be a miracle. These people are so quick they may actually make it home without getting a drop of rain on them. Typical characteristics are the head down, hunchback stance and whippet fast feet. They may be speed-walking, skip walking or just flat out running, but you bet your ass they are getting where they are going faster than you.
The Easter Island Heads:
Ah the mysterious statues and the even more mysterious people! I'm at a loss as to why these people all suddenly have the same facial expression as soon as the wind and rain hits, but the most certainly do.
How to spot and Easter Island Head:
The furrowed brow is the most apparent characteristic of these particular humans. It's almost as if they are puzzled by this wet stuff falling from the sky. It's either the inquisitive puzzled look or these people are actual geniuses that have discovered that furrowing your brow creates a ridge above the eyes protecting the rest of the face from the damp onslaught. Tell us Easter Islanders why do you do this??
Okay, now I know I said at the start that there were four types of people but whilst writing this I realised there are actually five...
Me:
Yes ME! I am a whole other type of rain person. I'm the crazy woman, Dick Van Dyking round lampposts, catching the rain on my tongue and singing along to whatever is on my iPhone (not going to lie it's almost always Taylor Swift). I love the rain, it is so refreshing, especially when you've just gotten off a stuffy train, which in my line of work is most of the freaking time.
So which stereotype suits you? Or are you just like me and Gene Kelly? Let me know if I've missed any!
Much Love
AJ xx
I'm like Gene Kelly - dancing along the road no brolly and getting soaked but having fun too!xxx
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